Open Letter #1

Dear Parents of Elementary Students,

When your school secretary tells you that she needs proof of your address, this is not her way of calling you a liar. I promise you, she couldn't really care less where you live. She really doesn't even care if you actually live there. She is just doing her job to make sure that the students attending her school are the students who actually live within her school's boundaries. This is so that she does not rob funding from other people's children's schools.

So please, do NOT give her the skank eye when you show up the day before open house with all 6 of your kids, your sister's 4 kids, and your "special friend"'s 3 kids by his ex and want to enroll them all simply because you have an address you are capable of writing down on paper. She has to have proof. If you are willing to go before a notary and lie saying all those kids actually live with you, go for it.

I still need to see your lease agreement, utility bill, mortgage statement, or other valid form of proof of residency. And yes, that smile on my face is fake!

Love,
Your School Secretary